Feck.

Jaron
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1) I got a girlfriend, "Cat", who actually makes me happy.
2) Being happy makes me unable to write.
3) Being unable to write frustrates me, stifles me, and makes me dissatisfied.
4) Being happy also makes me miserable and depressive.

Also, the reasons I figured that I liked here were:
- good sex (which I can get from any ol' slut)
- good conversation (which I can get from any half-way intelligent bastard)
- good books (which I get on my own)
- good debates (which I get from my other personalities, and friends)
- good thinking (i.e., higher level stuff, that I get from friends as well)

It doesn't help that she's in the middle of her period right now, and braindead from exams. :/

I mean, sure, she makes me laugh but since I'm in such a shitty mood from all that, it's just like, "whatever" and "meh" all the time. I don't laugh much, in real life, anyways.

AND IT'S ONLY FUCKING BEEN THREE FUCKING WEEKS

(Incidentally, my third longest relationship ever.)

Consentrate on the good things? Sure.
- smart
- cool
- good looking
- good in bed
- puts up with my stupid-ass

Still, I can't quite forget the smell of her bloody menstrual fluids all over my jeans. And my shirt. I had to throw both out, and my boxers, and my jacket. I just got new clothes from a friend, and the little chunky bits were stuck in my pubes and I couldn't get 'em out for most of a day, and god... but I smelled.

But seriously, though.

What am I supposed to do with this girl, and why?


Posted May 7th, 2003 by Jaron

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Robot Puking
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I'M ROCKING ASSES IN THE CHAT ROOM!

I WANT ME A LIMERICK!


Fri, 05/09/2003 - 06:10  

Anonymous
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jesus, that is the nastiest thing i ahve ever read here. if any chick did that to me, the shit would be over toot sweet


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 02:53  

Anonymous
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me too


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 05:33  

Anonymous
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so very true


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 05:45  

Anonymous
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you have outdone yourself my friend


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 05:54  

Anonymous
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this thread is soooo dumb, i think my head's gonna explode. back to the limericks please


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 14:51  

Anonymous
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i dont know why im complaining, every single thread turns out like this, so i guess ill have to go with the flow...


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 21:25  

knoxville
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eww jaron common you did it during her period. fuck it prolly looked like the texas chainsaw massacre after you two were done


Wed, 05/07/2003 - 20:06  

knoxville
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well i once painted a face on my hand, it was a lot cheaper, didnt haveta take it out for dinner, movie or anythign


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 00:59  

knoxville
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by mirkah [/i]
[B]There was once a lad named Knox
Who dreamed of bagging a fox
he really wanted a girl
But no one would give him a whirl
So he ended up cleaning up with his socks

:) [/B][/QUOTE]

MIRKAH!!!! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA BE THE LUCKY ONE TO GIVE ME A WHIRL!


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 03:28  

moe.ron
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hmmm...comment on riding the red river, or chug the sauza....


Wed, 05/07/2003 - 18:31  

moe.ron
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by mirkah [/i]
[B]There was once a an exceptional lass named Moe.ron
who took exception to a virgin named Jaron
she ripped of his clothes
punched him in the nose
and said, now baby, maybe I'll let you suck on my tampon [/B][/QUOTE]

mirkah, to be the recipient and subject of such a gross display of love renders me almost speechless. almost.

there once was a girl from culver city
who got laid off from her job, what a pity!
Now she posts all day
And is teh gay
but we love her limericks – so witty!

i'm sorry this isn't the fitting tribute i'd hoped it would be, but i've said it before: i suck.


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 14:32  

moe.ron
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to whom are you speaking, klopster? me? no, i don't paint my fingernails, and i have excellent posture. but thanks for checking.


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 15:43  

moe.ron
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how about "toka" like "midnight toka"


Fri, 05/09/2003 - 14:48  

kloopper
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Do one about me and I'll choke you in your sleep.


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 09:39  

kloopper
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Wesley Sonck [/i]
[B]edit: Do [b]another[/b] one about me [b]or[/b] I'll choke you in your sleep. [/B][/QUOTE] You ar misteakan.


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 12:15  

kloopper
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Anoether? Where is teh anoether poems?


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 12:27  

kloopper
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one two
chachacha
three four
chachacha


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 12:41  

kloopper
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I'm gother than you, mutherfucker.


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 07:10  

kloopper
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by insomnomaniac [/i]
[B]kl0pper, nice try, just a liiiiittle late. [/B][/QUOTE] *kl0pper grabs your arm, twists it behind your back COPS-style and drops you to the floor*
*kl0pper whips out a staplegun and staples your fingertips to the small of your back*
*kl0pper kicks you in the asshole six times*


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 16:36  

insomnomaniac
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at the risk of being scarred for life, can i have a limerick?

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 05:31  

insomnomaniac
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btw, jaron, i think you solved your own problem. the whole menstrual fluid thing made you pretty unhappy by the sound of it. so now you're unhappy. there ya go.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 05:39  

insomnomaniac
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*claps* excellent.

reminds me of a keychain i used to have...one of the few of those obnoxious "saying" keychains i ever bought. of course i broke it after like five minutes, which is why i don't usually buy keychains...anyway. it said, "I'M IN A BAD MOOD...CARE TO JOIN ME?"

lol. that's me!

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 07:47  

insomnomaniac
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this has to be the most supreme form of hijackage i have ever witnessed.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Fri, 05/09/2003 - 21:59  

insomnomaniac
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well, jaron, if the problem is you can't be yourself, it's not going to last whether you show her your darker side or not. go find some scary goth chick who won't bat an eye.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 05:03  

insomnomaniac
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lol disx it warms my heart to see that you're an equal-opportunity asshole.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 06:11  

insomnomaniac
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LOLOLOL best post EVER wes.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 07:07  

insomnomaniac
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kl0pper, nice try, just a liiiiittle late.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 07:16  

insomnomaniac
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[QUOTE]this thread is soooo dumb, i think my head's gonna explode. back to the limericks please[/QUOTE]

now THAT's the sign of a desperate situation--when you're requesting a return to the limericks.

oh, and kl0pper, you are soooooo hardcore. lol.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 21:23  

insomnomaniac
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go read the "Gross Accomplishments" thread. now THAT is time well spent.

__________________________

[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]

[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 21:46  

Rents
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Cla-ssy. Me next. :D


Thu, 05/08/2003 - 02:21  

Rents
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Like Kitty said, Fram, take it to the Gross Accomplishments thread.


Sun, 05/11/2003 - 10:06  

Wesley Sonck
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get married, and produce more cracker sprogs.

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Wed, 05/07/2003 - 06:53  

Wesley Sonck
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so... i take it, you didnt enjoy it all that much ?

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Wed, 05/07/2003 - 14:47  

Wesley Sonck
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by mirkah [/i]
[B]there was once a slut called Wes
all the birds agreed he was the best
but then he tasted the dick
of the great Palahniuk
and never went back to the nest

:) [/B][/QUOTE]

*sob*

my honour has been be-smirched.

is that the right word?

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Thu, 05/08/2003 - 04:53  

Wesley Sonck
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by kl0pper [/i]
[B]Do one about me and I'll choke you in your sleep. [/B][/QUOTE]

edit: Do [b]another[/b] one about me [b]or[/b] I'll choke you in your sleep.

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Thu, 05/08/2003 - 11:36  

Wesley Sonck
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no, thats what i mean melvin.

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Thu, 05/08/2003 - 12:22  

Wesley Sonck
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teh poems are not online.

youll have to wait.

dance in the meantime.

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Thu, 05/08/2003 - 12:36  

Wesley Sonck
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by mirkah [/i]
[B]Did you not notice, no one cares about you and your GF. The only aspect of your original post that was of any interest to anyone was the sex_blood_ew_yucky part.

We're having fun here , go party in *200* [/B][/QUOTE]

cat-t-t-t-t-ty. rowr. lol.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 04:43  

Wesley Sonck
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see. i told ya' ! OR is it my posts that just got igonored? lol.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 04:49  

Wesley Sonck
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teh *rick*?
fodder?

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 04:58  

Wesley Sonck
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i wonder if i have permanent damage?

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 05:02  

Wesley Sonck
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but im dark. honest, i am.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 05:15  

Wesley Sonck
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have i not told you about my teen gothness? it co-incided with the first blowjob i got. im dark, i promise. heaps. see.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 05:21  

Wesley Sonck
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damn. i am cattle now. and sufficiently less dark.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 05:29  

Wesley Sonck
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Jaron [/i]
[B]

I'm used to being a man-slut. [/B][/QUOTE]

I feel... threatened?

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 06:42  

Wesley Sonck
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[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by insomnomaniac [/i]
[B]LOLOLOL best post EVER wes. [/B][/QUOTE]

really? i was just being a wad.

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 07:18  

Wesley Sonck
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oh? what if Bonny dont swing that way?

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Sat, 05/10/2003 - 12:58  

Wesley Sonck
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framboy, im a temp. cripple at the mo'.

what drugs are you on?

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Tue, 05/13/2003 - 03:21  

Rohan
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"Darker side"?

No offense intended, but the whole I'm-actually-evil-and-nasty-and-twisted thing is pretty cliched. In actuality, you're likely no more or less fucked up than anyone else here.


Sat, 05/10/2003 - 04:39  

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