Male Writing Erotica

I want to start writing erotica. This is not out of a need to attract members of the opposite sex nor is it a selfish ploy to present myself as a member of the male species who may "understand" the emotional dimensions required in writing erotica. I don't understand these dimensions. I can pretend to understand. That's what makes me a writer. We can put ourselves in the lives and the knowledge of others. We can make ourselves sound like Socrates, and on the other hand, we can make ourselves sound like the town idiot. Before I push everyone who reads this to think the latter of me, I want to declare that I am a writer because of a passionate, innate need to be a writer. I see things unfold in my head, my mind's eye, Bill Hicks' third eye- call it what you will- I see stories unwrap before me as if they are real movies in life. And I write what I see, what I hear, what I know, what I feel, taste, smell, eat, love, fuck, love, hate.....etc.

So , erotica. I first have to understand the difference between erotica and porn. There is a difference. Erotica is intelligent porn- a friend of mine says. Intelligent porn. Nina Hartley teaching Greek. That's intelligent porn. Erotica is porn with feeling. Is it? I can write pornography with plenty of feeling and not have one bit of eroticism involved. I think it's hidden in the description of things.

Porn: his cock rammed deep into her wet inviting pussy.

Erotica: he buried himself into her, feeling her body enclose around him, her muscles tighenting with each of flush of pleasureable thrust.

My conflict is how to describe things. Do I use the slang words for the anatomy? Is it safe to use words like cock, pussy, tits? At what point does it fall from erotica to smut? If I write: He pulled out his cock and shot his load on her inviting chest. She licked the cum from his cock as if starving. How can I bring forth emotion in this? How about: he withdrew and unloaded upon her flesh, each drop dripping down her chest like the rain on the window pane. She kissed him and licked away the drops without tasting the rain.

Im confused!

I don't want to sound sappy. I don't want to sound stupid or goofy. My female friends say I'm not going to be able to write male erotica. My male friends want to read more. I think it gets them off. It's weird to know the guys I go to concerts with or share a brew with here and there want to read my stories of sexual adventures, and their wives could care less. Maybe I'm not letting a feminine voice come through my writing enough. I need to pick my target audience. Is there such a thing as erotica for men? And my friends who are gay, they could care less. They read erotica for women and imagine they're in the role of the woman. This may work.

I've written a few lines so far. A few pages here and there. I'm not sure where to end it though. Slang or technical terms are my biggest challenge. I don't want it to sound like it was written by a thirteen year-old boy describing to his friends what he saw his mom and dad doing the night before, and I also don't want it to read like a book on the human anatomy.