An Asshole's Quest

in The Stand, The Kid's quest is across the American west and he has anal sex with the Trashcan Man.

Alright. After reading through all this and taking a few moments to digest everything. I think I'm ready to give you a response. And I think it deserves a serious, well thought out and meaningful reply. Because this is the stupidest fucking shitpile I have read in the past 90 days. And that kind of ignorance needs to be treated special.  

Now I don't know where you copy and pasted this all from, or even if you're the actual  writer of it, but it's obviously not original material. No one here knows (or cares) who the fuck Micheal Leonard Oberdick, Switch-a-roo or The Big Irish are.  

Now what I find insulting about this particular blog is your stereotypes and generalities. Not so much the ones that you list, and yeah, those are pretty bad, but the ones you presume. You infer that anyone that reads this mess is going to be as close-minded and angry at meaningless shit as you. You've created this "Guy" stereotype that you feel should be exalted and held up above other "lower" stereotypes and the whole thing smells like hot, wet vomit.  

You've obviously done zero research on this place to find out what kind of people post and read here and assume they are all going to be Tyler Durden disciples and want to wear a philosophy as a brand name. Otherwise you'd have noticed that the blog feature here sucks. There's nothing about them that stands out and seperates them from ordinary threads. But you seem to have chosen to pour this spitum out here because it's labeled "Blog" and that's the stereotypical category to place shit like this. Most people here seem to pride themselves on Independant Thought and [b]not[/b] following a herd mentality.  

A couple of problems I have with some specific points you make are: 

 1.) "pontificate" isn't that obscure of a word. Not to anyone that's read more than just Howard Stern's biography. Telling us to look it up just shows contempt for your reader and shows how uneductaed you are yourself.  

2.)

Notwithstanding the previously discussed pedophiles being never previously discussed; what bothers me about this is the preceding passages about "The type of jackass who does this,.. The type of cocksucker that does that..." line of thought. After that, reading this line sounds like the asshole who has plans to go after kid-touching priests is another one on your list of people to "get." It makes you like like some mighty army NAMBLA has sent out to right all the wrongs done against pedophiles in the name of "morals and decency!"  

3.) You're going to have fantasy sports but also non-opinion based sports reporting. Fantasy sports does not exist without opinionated people and non-opinionated sports reporting is passionless, medical-textbook dry and boring as fuck.  

4.)

If you're going to put that many hyphens into a word, put all fucking three of them in there. But's that's more just a personal pet peeve of mine, so I'll move on...  

The biggest problem I have with this, the most stomach-churning, white-hot, wishing for the Mayan calendar to run out in four years and this whole sad experiment universally collapse on itself hatred I have is the blatant marketing being done here.  

You want to create the mythical website? Guess what, it already exists. It's called MySpace and it already does all those things you mentioned and more. Not only that, but there's already countless spin-offs of it with other websites doing the exact same thing as well. What you're saying is that you want to MAKE MONEY off of an idea that's already shown to be profitable and you have no new ideas of your own so you're going try to create a need when there is none.  

I hope this whole attempt has already failed; seeing as how your blogpot is nothing but a bunch of ads for ringtones, porn and online horse betting now and your cafepress store is non-existant. But even if this particular one is gone, there's bound to be another fucking goon come along later and try the same thing so that's why I'll include this bit of rant.  

The whole personality you've presented here feels so forced and contrived and cliched that it's maddening. A vibe just pours off the screen that you want people to join your cause, that you'll drop in names like "switcharoo" or "Big Irish" to make it feel like there's already people joined, so you, the reader, don't have to worry about being the first person to step up with me, that "no, i'm not alone and trying to make it appear as there's this whole movement and we need you!" when all you are really after is a way to make a living by other people giving you money.  

Which brings us to the end. Begging!  

Now, I love tits. I think they are the greatest proof that there is an all-knowing, wonderful, merciful and caring creator God that there is. And when you stoop to begging for women to send you pictures of their tits with your name written on them I find it offensive to my love for them and tits in general!  

Begging and pleading for anyone to give you a picture of their tits is just pathetic. And I mean that in the truest sense of the word. I don't mean that hatefully or mockingly. It comes from desperate boys who don't know how, for good or ill, to see tits in real life. Ones that would stand underneath stairs or bleachers just hoping to get a glimpse of some girl walking up in a skirt. I truly feel bad for guys like that because they have true problems dealing with social situations and if that's you're case then don't take all this  to heart. But if you can get some action at home and you're still resorting to begging for tits online then fuck you and grow a goddamn pair of scrotes and learn how to be a fucking man!  

Tits shouldn't be something you beg for, they are something you should get freely! That's what makes them so special. They're a gift! Begging for them makes you sound like a kid that whined and bitched to mommy and daddy at Christmas for the new toy that was out that year.  

And if you do get someone to send you [b]unsolicited[/b] tits, and if they've written your name on them in the heat of the moment because of their honest enjoyment out of what you've said, then you should hold them up as a glorious prize, the highest form of flattery one can get on the internet. Don't make it seem like you're the one doing them a favor by accepting their tits and allowing them to be a part of you're special club.  

and in closing, let me emphasize my previous post. Denis Leary is an unimaginative fucking hack and the only thing he has going for him is his angry irish guy act.   

nate deverves a kissie.

I didn't. 

nate response deserves some sort of internet applause

but those are nice, too, nate

here's some more i forgot i had...